Play the pauses 

I remember hearing this term in a delightful remake of a classic movie which actually refers to a musicians performance. The teacher of a young girl struggling with her performance of Chopin’s Nocturne, offers this simple and insightful suggestion that a musical performance is as much in the pauses between notes as it is in the notes themselves.

At no period in my life has the word PAUSE been more relevant than now. I’ve taken a sabbatical from work, I’m not in a relationship for the first time in my adult life, am in a place in life where I feel both like a kid and an older person at the same time and now strangely am aware of the respite that breaking away from the relentless pace of a life lived on schedule brings.

I intend to PLAY THE PAUSE very very well.

It’s a red letter day

I SWAM AN ENTIRE LAP TODAY!!!! 
At the end of every year since 1993, I have hoped to accomplish something and today it finally happened. I just realised that for the first time on this blog, I will be ending the year without writing about my resolution to learn swimming. 

PS: I’m conflicted about how I feel about so many people telling me that they cried watching my speech for Scooby at his wedding 😕. 

So that is how the seas were tamed 

The Trevi fountain is the very stuff of which dreams are made. Neptune and his merpeople taming the ocean waters depicted in stone is a vision of mythical proportions. And maybe that is why even though I avoid clichĂ©-d experiences like the plague, I couldn’t help throwing coins over my shoulder and making a wish. Met a lovely young French couple from Marseille whose kids made the cutest wishes.

And just like I had at the gates of the Colosseum, I caught myself wondering how I would have never guessed that there would be a day when I would be putting my knowledge about Roman numerals from the second grade in school to use, in order to read dates inscribed on the Pantheon. It’s as surreal a realisation as it can get.

Life has brought me a very very long way. To a time when I can carve out magical days for myself instead of waiting for the cosmos to make them happen. I’m thanking all the 2000 Roman Gods in whose honour Julius Agrippa originally had this building commissioned.

Have you randomly seen your past self reflected in other people? 

I have in the past 24 hours seen my past self reflected multiple times.

  • A girl on a bike at a traffic light stopping under the shade of a tree on a very hot summer day, even though she is a few meters away from the signal. A brief respite from the scorching heat also looks welcome.
  • A tired but happy girl managing the desk and closing the accounts for the day at a salon, well past the time most of her colleagues have left.
  • Two summery kurta-patiala clad happy teenage girls wearing big jhumkas and zipping through my neighbourhood on a bike while singing the latest number by the Chainsmokers, loudly and without a care in the world.
  • A very confused junior associate who looks petrified at the extent of cluelessness she’s having to deal with at work.

Life, I realise has brought me such a long distance from where I started that there are times I fail to even recognise myself. I remember writing in this blog a few years ago that the 22 year old me would be in awe for days if she met the present day version. And on a day I have spent saying goodbye to so many people and things that I have grown to admire and get ready to flip a page, I feel awfully aware that I have been in this place before. The pause before a brand new beginning filled with a complete blank page.

It’s time to start writing I guess.